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May 2023

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Tom life insurance review 2023

As a dedicated father having life insurance protection in place is vital to ensure my child’s financial future. It is reassuring to know that if anything were to happen to me, she would still be properly provided for throughout her childhood and beyond.

But for those dads out there currently without life insurance in place where should you shop to secure the most cost-effective policy in 2023?

In this article we review Tom life insurance exploring the pros and cons of their specialist ‘life insurance for dads’ service…

Why do dads need life insurance?

As a dad, you probably need some form of life insurance to ensure that your family are financially protected should anything happen to you.

It’s a very sad fact that a child loses a parent every 22 minutes in the UK[1], yet 12% of dads still don’t have any form of life cover.

If your family were to lose you and your income, could they keep up with the following costs:

•       Mortgage or rental payments?

•       Household bills/utilities?

•       Childcare or education fees?

•       Outstanding debts in your name (credit cards, car finance or personal loans)

•       Funeral costs?

Life insurance can be taken out to help cover these costs and relieve financial worry for your loved ones during an already stressful time.

The proceeds could also be used as an inheritance in the future, helping your children or even grandchildren with university fees or getting on the property ladder.

Who are Tom life insurance?

Tom, also referred to tom.co.uk, are a life insurance broker that specialises in arranging life insurance for dads here in the UK.

They provide a completely free service that helps you to source life insurance quotes from a panel of FCA regulated providers.

Since forming in 2015, Tom has sold more than 50,000 policies to dads across the country.

Who owns Tom life insurance?

Tom.co.uk is owned and operated by Candid Insurance Service Ltd, an FCA regulated life insurance company based in Bristol.

Candid was established in 2013 and acquired the Tom and Polly brands in 2018 from AGT Media, growing these significantly since then.

In 2023, they launched their own life insurance and serious illness products aimed at mums and dads, which are underwritten by iptiQ.

Tom life insurance reviews

Is Tom life insurance any good?

At the time of writing this review, Tom life insurance has an average rating of ‘Excellent’ on Trustpilot from 2,301 customer reviews.

87% of reviews rated the company at 5 stars and only 6% rated 1 star. Suggesting that, according to their customers, Tom.co.uk is a very credible company.

Tom life insurance adverts

Tom.co.uk mainly uses influencer marketing to promote their service and raise awareness of life insurance to parents in the UK.

Maybe you have seen one of their ads on TV, social media or YouTube?

The company has worked with a long list of British celebrities including:

•       Tyson Fury

•       Ronan Keating

•       Joey Essex

•       Brian McFadden

•       Professor Green

•       Jeff Brazier

•       Duncan James

•       John Hartson

•       Neil Ruddock

How much is Tom Life Insurance?

The cost of Tom life insurance depends on your personal circumstances and the policy you choose (level term, decreasing term, joint cover or single policy).

Insurers will take into account the following details in order to calculate your monthly premium:

•       Age

•       Health and wellbeing

•       Medical history/family medical history

•       Whether you smoke

•       Weight/BMI

•       Occupation

•       Policy type

•       Cover amount

•       Cover length (term)

Life insurance premiums increase as you get older, so it’s important to take out a policy sooner rather than later to get the best deal.

The most effective way of finding the cheapest cover is to compare multiple quotes, as costs can vary wildly between providers.

You can do this for free through Tom or alternatively, you could use a non-advised FCA-regulated broker like Reassured.co.uk. They are the UK’s largest broker and have created this comprehensive Reassured: life insurance for dads article which may also be of interest.

How to buy Tom life insurance

This is how you can buy life insurance through Tom:

1.      Complete the free online quote form

2.      Get a call from an FCA authorised agent

3.      Discuss your requirements and the different policy types available

4.      Choose your policy with help from the agent

5.      Answer some questions about your health and lifestyle

6.      The agent will work out your monthly premium and provide quotes

It’s a similar process to buying life insurance through Reassured, except they can also offer you the option to buy life insurance online, without talking to an agent.

Tom life insurance contact number

If you need to contact Tom about your life insurance, then their contact details are as follows:

920 Hempton Court
Aztec West
West Almondsbury
Bristol
BS32 4SR

Contact number: 0808 175 2244

Email: [email protected]

Who are Polly life insurance?

While Tom.co.uk is marketed to sell life insurance to UK dads, Polly.co.uk is marketed to sell life insurance mums. The service is effectively the same, however it is packaged to appeal specifically to mums.

Polly has also worked with an array of celebrities in order to promote their service, including Hollyoaks actress Jorgie Porter and Olympic swimmer Rebecca Adlington.

Since 2015, Polly.co.uk has sold over 750,000 policies and has more than 4,500 customer reviews on Trustpilot with an overall rating of ‘Excellent’.

Tom life insurance review summary

Tom.co.uk is a legitimate FCA regulated company and could help you compare life insurance quotes from a network of UK insurers.

Although, it’s not clear which insurers they work with or which policies they have available, except for the ones we’ve described above.

Regardless of how you secure your cover, it is imperative to shop around to compare quotes to identify the best available deal. This is especially true for so many families during these tough economic times.

Life insurance is there for a worst-case scenario and acts as a safety blanket. It is one of those things which many of us don’t think we will ever need; however, it could end up being the best investment you ever make.

If you are in early adulthood and healthy you could secure approximately £200,000 of cover for 20p a day.

So why not seize the day, secure your loved one’s future and get on with enjoying life safe in the knowledge that your finances are all in order?

[1] https://www.childbereavementuk.org/death-bereavement-statistics

Coparenting & Relationships

The Role of Mediation in Co-parenting After a Toxic Relationship: A Comprehensive Guide

Navigating the aftermath of a toxic relationship can be challenging, particularly when children are involved. In the quest to provide a stable, loving environment for your children, co-parenting becomes a necessary but sometimes difficult journey. One of the most effective strategies for easing this process is through mediation. This comprehensive guide will explore the role of mediation in co-parenting after a toxic relationship.

Understanding Mediation in the Context of Co-parenting

Mediation is a form of conflict resolution that involves a neutral third party – the mediator. The mediator’s role is to facilitate open communication between the two parties, helping them find common ground and make decisions that benefit all parties involved, especially the children. This process is particularly helpful in the context of co-parenting after a toxic relationship, where communication may be strained, and emotions might run high.

The Importance of Mediation in Co-parenting

Why is mediation so essential in co-parenting after a toxic relationship? Let’s look at some of the key reasons:

  1. Improved Communication: Mediation provides a neutral platform for both parties to voice their concerns and needs. The mediator helps structure these conversations, promoting respectful and effective communication, which is crucial for successful co-parenting.
  2. Child-Centred Decisions: The mediator ensures that the child’s best interest is always at the forefront of all discussions and decisions. This approach helps parents shift from their conflict to focusing on their child’s needs.
  3. Conflict Resolution: Mediation aids in resolving disputes about child-rearing decisions, visitation schedules, and other contentious issues. It helps create a more peaceful environment for the children.
  4. Long-term Co-parenting Plan: Mediation can help create a comprehensive co-parenting plan. This plan includes day-to-day responsibilities, special occasions, dispute resolution processes, and any other elements that are necessary for smooth co-parenting.

How Mediation Works in Co-parenting

Mediation sessions usually involve both parents and the mediator. The process may vary depending on individual circumstances, but a typical mediation process involves the following steps:

Introduction:
The mediator explains the process, rules, and goals of mediation.

Sharing Perspectives:
Each parent has a chance to share their views and concerns without interruption.

Discussion:
The mediator facilitates a discussion, helping both parents to understand each other’s perspectives and to identify and prioritize issues that need to be resolved.

Negotiation:
Both parents, with the help of the mediator, work on finding common ground and compromises on the issues identified.

Agreement:
Once an agreement is reached, the mediator drafts it. After reviewing and signing, this document can serve as a roadmap for co-parenting.

The Benefits of Mediation in Co-parenting After a Toxic Relationship

The benefits of mediation in co-parenting after a toxic relationship are numerous:

Reduced Conflict:
By providing a neutral space for negotiation, mediation can significantly reduce conflict and tension between co-parents.

Control Over Decisions:
Unlike court decisions, mediation allows parents to have control over decisions affecting their children’s lives.

Improved Relationships:
Mediation can help improve the overall co-parenting relationship by establishing effective communication patterns and reducing hostility.

Children’s Well-being:
By reducing conflict and promoting cooperative co-parenting, mediation helps to foster a more stable and positive environment for the children.

Choosing a Mediator:
Choosing the right mediator is crucial. Here are a few tips to help you make the right choice:

Experience and Training:
Look for a mediator who has specialized training and experience in divorce and family mediation.

Neutrality:
The mediator should be neutral and unbiased. They should not take sides but focus on facilitating productive discussions between both parents.

Approach and Philosophy:
Understand the mediator’s approach and philosophy towards co-parenting and mediation. Make sure it aligns with your values and expectations.

Fees:
Understand their fee structure. Some mediators charge a flat fee, while others charge by the hour.

What to Expect in Co-parenting Mediation:
Coming into mediation, it’s important to be prepared for the process. Here’s what you can expect:

Preparation:
Before you start, gather all necessary documents and think through what you want for your children. It’s also helpful to prepare yourself emotionally.

Multiple Sessions:
Mediation usually takes place over several sessions. Each session typically lasts about one to two hours

Cooperation and Compromise:
Mediation is about finding common ground, which often involves compromises. Be ready to listen, understand, and work cooperatively with your ex-partner for the best interests of your children.

Confidentiality:
What’s said in mediation stays in mediation. It’s a safe space to express your concerns, needs, and expectations.

Legal Advice:
Mediators do not provide legal advice. It’s recommended to consult with a lawyer during the mediation process to understand the legal implications of your decisions.

After Mediation: Co-parenting Successfully
Once the mediation process is complete, and a co-parenting plan is in place, the focus shifts to implementing the plan effectively. Here are a few tips to co-parent successfully after a toxic relationship:

Respect the Co-parenting Plan:
The co-parenting plan is there for a reason. Both parents should respect the plan and adhere to it.

Communicate Effectively:
Remember the communication skills learned during mediation. Use these skills to communicate effectively with your ex-partner.

Stay Child-Focused:
Always prioritize your children’s needs and well-being. Any decision or action should be based on what’s best for them.

Seek Support:
Co-parenting after a toxic relationship can be challenging. Don’t hesitate to seek support from friends, family, support groups, or a professional counsellor.

Practice Self-Care:
Taking care of your mental and physical health is crucial. It allows you to be the best parent you can be for your children.

In conclusion, mediation plays a vital role in co-parenting after a toxic relationship. It helps establish a groundwork for effective communication, reduces conflict, and ensures the best interests of the child are prioritized. For more insights into co-parenting after a toxic relationship, check out our previous article on “Co-parenting after a toxic relationship: Strategies and Tips“.

By understanding and utilizing mediation, you can transition from a toxic relationship to a successful co-parenting partnership, creating a stable, loving environment for your children to thrive in. Remember, it’s not the separation, but the conflict that can harm children. Through effective mediation, that conflict can be managed and minimized, ensuring the well-being of your children.

Coparenting & Relationships

Co-Parenting After a Toxic Relationship: A Guide to Positive Parenting

Co-parenting after a toxic relationship can be a mountainous task filled with emotional turmoil and practical challenges. However, for parents committed to the well-being of their children, it’s a necessary path. This comprehensive guide seeks to help parents navigate this difficult journey, offering strategies for maintaining effective communication, setting boundaries, and prioritizing the child’s emotional health.

Understanding the Challenge

Embarking on the journey of co-parenting after a toxic relationship often feels like an uphill battle. It’s not merely about sharing responsibilities but handling lingering negative emotions, unresolved conflicts, and potential communication breakdowns. It’s a delicate balancing act, requiring you to detach from the painful past while working together for your child’s future.

The root of the challenge lies in the nature of toxic relationships. They leave emotional scars, foster mistrust, and create an environment of negativity. Carrying these burdens into your co-parenting arrangement can complicate matters, making it harder to focus on your child’s needs. But remember, your goal is to foster a healthy environment for your child to grow, and this goal must overshadow the complications of the past.

Setting Boundaries

One crucial step in co-parenting after a toxic relationship is setting clear, healthy boundaries. These boundaries aren’t about keeping score or limiting the other parent’s involvement, but rather about protecting your personal space and emotional health. They also play a critical role in preventing old issues from creeping into your new parenting arrangement.

Setting boundaries may entail deciding on specific pick-up and drop-off times, limiting communication to necessary topics related to your child, or delineating what topics are off-limits for discussion. The key is to be clear about your needs without infringing on the other parent’s rights or the child’s needs. When both parents understand and respect these boundaries, the co-parenting arrangement can function more smoothly.

Effective Communication

Communication, the cornerstone of any relationship, becomes even more critical when co-parenting after a toxic relationship. It may be challenging to maintain open lines of communication when there is a history of pain and conflict, but for the sake of your child, it’s essential.

Try to use neutral language to avoid triggering old arguments. Focus on your child’s needs during discussions and keep personal issues separate. It’s also crucial to be clear, concise, and consistent in your communication. This approach can help reduce misunderstandings and keep the focus on the well-being of your child.

In some situations, direct communication might be too fraught with tension. In these cases, consider using technology to help. Numerous co-parenting apps offer platforms for messaging, scheduling, and sharing essential child-related information. This can help maintain necessary communication while providing a record of correspondence.

In particularly challenging situations, seeking the help of a professional mediator might be beneficial. They can facilitate conversations, help resolve disputes, and keep the focus on the child’s best interests.

Prioritizing the Child’s Emotional Health

The emotional fallout of a toxic relationship can cast a long shadow, and children often bear the brunt of it. Feelings of confusion, sadness, or anxiety are common in children after their parents separate. As co-parents, it’s your responsibility to help them navigate these challenging emotions.

Regularly engage in open, honest conversations with your child, ensuring they feel seen, heard, and understood. Encourage them to express their feelings and reassure them that it’s okay to feel upset or confused. Keep them informed about changes in a way they can understand, and reassure them of your love and support.

It’s crucial to avoid badmouthing the other parent in front of your child

as this can increase their stress and negatively impact their relationship with both parents. Remember, your child’s relationship with their other parent is independent of your relationship with your ex-partner. Encouraging a healthy bond with both parents can play a crucial role in your child’s emotional well-being.

In some cases, seeking professional help can be beneficial. Child psychologists or counsellors can provide a safe space for your child to express their feelings and learn coping strategies. Additionally, they can offer valuable guidance to parents about managing their child’s emotional needs during this challenging time.

Creating a Co-Parenting Plan

A well-thought-out co-parenting plan can be an invaluable tool in navigating post-separation parenting. This plan should outline each parent’s responsibilities, define custody schedules, and establish protocols for decision-making and resolving disputes. The goal is to create a structured environment that reduces uncertainties and potential areas of conflict.

When drafting a co-parenting plan, it’s crucial to consider the child’s needs and preferences. This includes their school schedule, extracurricular activities, social events, and even downtime. It’s also important to include provisions for holidays, vacations, and special occasions, which can often be points of contention.

A flexible yet detailed co-parenting plan can help both parents understand their roles and responsibilities. It provides a roadmap that helps navigate co-parenting after a toxic relationship, with the child’s well-being at its centre. Remember, the plan may need to be revised as circumstances change and your child grows. Flexibility is key to successful co-parenting.

Seeking Support

Co-parenting after a toxic relationship can be a demanding and isolating experience. It’s important to remember that seeking support during this challenging time is not a sign of weakness, but rather an act of strength. This support could come in various forms – a support group for single parents, a counselor, or trusted friends and family.

Support groups can offer a sense of community and understanding that friends or family may not be able to provide. They can also offer practical advice and resources to help you navigate co-parenting challenges.

Professional help in the form of counselling or therapy can also be beneficial. Professionals can provide strategies for managing stress, improving communication, and dealing with unresolved feelings related to the toxic relationship.

Conclusion

Co-parenting after a toxic relationship is undoubtedly challenging, but with patience, resilience, and a child-focused approach, it can be a successful endeavour. By setting boundaries, communicating effectively, prioritizing your child’s emotional health, and seeking support, you can navigate this journey in a healthy and positive way.

Remember, every family is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Stay patient, flexible, and open-minded in your co-parenting approach. After all, your unwavering commitment and love for your child are the most significant driving forces behind successful co-parenting. Here’s to fostering positivity and growth, even in the wake of difficult circumstances.

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